The Marines win again. Could there have been any other possible outcome?
Well, at least they won in Los Angeles, shown at maximum explosive volume in “Battle: Los Angeles,” which opens here today. All we know for sure is that they defeated a bunch of invading aliens in one city, though TV reporters keep interrupting the fire fights to tell us of at least 20 cities around the world that are under attack.
But as long as we have L.A., which obviously means that the movie industry is safe to make more movies as absurdly dumb as this one, all’s right with the world.
Aaron Eckhart, who has maybe one-and-a-half expressions, is our heroic Marine staff sergeant who has just received his retirement papers at Camp Pendleton when the world-wide attack is announced. You might wonder about what happened in other time zones, but don’t worry about it. Just keep your faith in Hollywood and the Marines.
Eckhart has been haunted ever since he survived a battle on some other continent while most of his command was wiped out. The remainder of the cast consists of B-picture or TV actors looking for credits, or else real actors who changed their names as soon as they saw the script. It’s a standard war picture, with diverse people who may help the box office overseas, but they’re all just interchangeable, anonymous pieces who can be seen in any war photos since those made by Matthew Brady, or in a TV shot last night from Afghanistan. It offers the same mixed bag as all standard war movies, though L.A. is so covered with concrete there’s no space to dig foxholes,.
Of course, Eckhart is assigned to a platoon whose commanding office (Ramon Rodriguez) is taking his first command. One of the jarheads turns out to be the brother of a Marine who died in Eckhart’s previous command. We also have a group of rescued people, , including a veterinarian (Bridget Moynahan) who figures out where the aliens’ vital organs are, a woman Marine (Michelle Rodriguez) who turns out to shoot really well and, for some extra dramatic impact, the opportunity to join a little boy watching his father die.
The technical work is outstanding, with brilliant fireballs, speedy jet fighters, splendid work with cars and freeways, explosions of all types, weird-looking aliens in weirder-looking vehicles. It’s all about equipment and machines. It’s not about people. It’s a fine movie for those who like to destroy things.
Battle: Los Angeles opens today on many screens
—Joe